darpan

An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice... "Let me tell you a story."


"I too, at times, have felt great hate for those who have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It's like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times. "


"It is as if there are two wolves inside me; one is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way."


"But...the other wolf... ah! The littlest thing will send him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all of the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing."


"Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit."


The boy looked intently into his Grandfather's eyes and asked, "Which one wins, Grandfather ?"


The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, "The one I feed."

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through --

So he prayed:

"Dear Lord:
I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home.
I want her to know what I go through.
So, please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen!"

God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.

The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate,
awakened the kids,
set out their school clothes,
fed them breakfast,
packed their lunches,
drove them to school,
came home and picked up the dry cleaning,
took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit,
went grocery shopping,
then drove home to put away the groceries,
paid the bills and balanced the check book.
He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.
Then, it was already 01 P.M.

And he hurried to make the beds,
do the laundry, vacuum,
dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
Ran to the school to pick up the kids
and got into an argument with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies
and got the kids organized to do their homework.
Then, set up the ironing board
and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes
and washing vegetables for salad,
breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.

After supper,
he cleaned the kitchen,
ran the dishwasher,
folded laundry,
bathed the kids,
and put them to bed.
at 09 P.M .

He was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished,
he went to bed where he was expected to make love,
which he managed to get through without complaint.

The next morning,
he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: -
'Lord, I don't know what I was thinking.
I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day.
Please, oh! oh! Please, let us trade back. Amen!'

The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied:
'My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were.
But You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night.'

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LOVE - When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST- when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

LOVE - When intercourse is called "making love."
LUST - When intercourse is called "screwing."
MARRIAGE - When intercourse is a town in Pennsylvania. There really is one.

LOVE - When you argue over how many children to have.
LUST - When you argue over who gets the wet spot?
MARRIAGE - When you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.


LOVE - When you share everything you own.
LUST - When you steal everything they own.
MARRIAGE - When the bank owns everything.

LOVE - When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
LUST - When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE - When . . . uh . . . what's a climax?

LOVE - When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."
LUST - When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
MARRIAGE - When you phone each other to ***** about work.

LOVE - When you write poems about your partner.
LUST - When all you write is your phone number.
MARRIAGE - When all you write is checks.

LOVE - When your only concern is for your partner's feelings.
LUST - When your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all-round.
MARRIAGE - When you're only concern is what's on T.V.

LOVE - When you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
LUST - When you only see each other naked.
MARRIAGE - When you never see each other awake.

LOVE - When your heart flutters every time you see them.
LUST - When your groin twitches every time you see them.
MARRIAGE - When your wallet empties every time you see them.

LOVE - When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
LUST - When the song on the radio determines how you do it.
MARRIAGE - When you listen to talk radio.

LOVE - When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
LUST - When staying together is something you try not to think about.
MARRIAGE - When just getting through the day is your only thought.

LOVE - When you're only interested in doing things with your partner.
LUST - When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.
MARRIAGE - When you're only interested in your golf score.

LOVE - When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and talk.
LUST - When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and have sex.
MARRIAGE - When a rainy day means it's time to clean the basement.

LOVE - You only leave the house to buy coffee and doughnuts.
LUST - You only leave the house to buy condoms and Vaseline.
MARRIAGE - You only leave the house when you're allowed.

Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial.

The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.


The first one came back and said to the king, 'I brought ten apples.' The king then explained the trial to him. 'You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten up.'


Two apples went in?.. But on the third one he winced out in pain, so he was killed.

The second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this should be easy.

1...2...3... 4...5...6. ..7...8.. . and on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.


The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, 'Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?'

The second one replied, 'I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with pineapples.'

Horror gripped the heart of a World War-I soldier, as he saw his lifelong friend fall in battle. The soldier asked his Lieutenant if he could go out to bring his fallen comrade back.


"You can go," said the Lieutenant," but don't think it will be worth it.


Your friend is probably dead and you may throw your life away."



"The Lieutenant's words didn't matter, and the soldier went anyway.


Miraculously, he managed to reach his friend, hoisted him onto his shoulder and brought him back to their company's trench. The officer checked the wounded soldier, then looked kindly at his friend.


"I told you it wouldn't be worth it," he said. "Your friend is dead and you are mortally wounded."


"It was worth it, Sir," said the soldier.


"What do you mean by worth it?" responded the Lieutenant. "Your friend is dead."


"Yes Sir," the soldier answered,


"but it was worth it because when I got to him, he was still alive and I had the satisfaction of hearing him say....


"Jim...I knew you'd come."



*******


Many times in life, whether a thing is worth doing or not, really depends on how u look at it.


Take up all your courage and do something your heart tells you to do so that you may not regret not doing it later in your life........

There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand.

This virus is called Weary-Overload- Recreational- Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT.

This virus will wipe out your private life completely.

If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest grocery store.

Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolating- Neutralizer- Extract (WINE) or Bothersome-Employer -Elimination- Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

You should forward this warning to 5 friends. If you do not have 5 friends, you have already been infected...